Friday, March 22, 2013

Car Trouble, Ma'am?

Imagine this if you will...

You're on your way home after a long day of work (my children are convinced that my job is watching cat videos all day, but maybe you're an accountant or something similarly grown up). You've just completed a run to Walmart for necessities (milk, bread, marshmallow Easter eggs, new box of crayons) before the next snow storm hits. 

As you pull up to the exit ramp you see what appears to be a motorist (at least 4 adults in a green Dodge Caravan) having car troubles (you question if this is actually a Chinese fire drill) in the center lane of the overpass you need to drive across to get home. You slow down as a courtesy (but really, to get a better look at what in the hell is going on) to the distressed driver and can't help but notice (craning your neck like something straight out of The Exorcist, honestly) the scene as it plays out before your eyes:

Man exits van from driver's seat
Woman exits van from passenger's seat
Second man exits van from middle row
First man gets back into the van's passenger seat
Woman and second man walk to the back of the van
Woman opens back hatch and shoves second man into trunk area
Woman slams back hatch on van and kicks bumper emphatically
Woman calls second man a "real asshole"*
Woman gets into the driver's seat and they drive away

You guys, that happened on my way home from work tonight (You know I'm not making it up because, well,  it's me and crazy stuff like this doesn't happen on a regular basis to anyone but me.) and it was hilarious! (Unless it was a kidnapping that I witnessed...)

*Slightly embellished. She was yelling at him and if it had been me, I would've called him an asshole. I didn't want to roll the window down and listen though because that would've just made the whole thing awkward.