About once a week my nephews get to ride home from Harrisonville with Aunt Bubby (me) and they're filled with stories. They've been fishing a lot this summer and I do love a good fishing story - especially when told by an 8 year old and a 5 year old. Why, just last week, Jonis was sooo close to catching a sea horse in someone's pond. His dad came to pick him up early though and don't you know that sea horse got away. Dad's have terrible timing sometimes!
Today when his Dad and I went to lunch at the local Chinese place, this sign greeted us at the door.
The boys are old enough to earn their keep, right? Jimmy and I thought so and on the drive home tonight, I attempted to use their fishing skills to my advantage.
ME: Guys, are you planning on doing any fishing in the next couple of days?
EMAN: I don't know... Dad are we going fishing?
JIMMY: Um nope.
ME: Well, Aunt Bub needs you to go catch a lot of fish so that I can trade it in for Chinese food.
EMAN: Whaaaaat?! Who would do that? Who would give you Chinese food for fish?
JIMMY: Chinese people. We're going to need a lot of fish, son.
EMAN: So you can get Chinese food for free?
ME: I love egg rolls & fried rice. Like 20 fish probably.
EMAN: You're crazy Aunt Bubby...
JONIS: Aunt Bubby! Guess what kind of fish Bubby (Eman) caught!
EMAN: Oh yeah! Let me tell her what you called it! Dad can I say it?
JONIS: No! Bubby! It's a bad word, you can't say it!
JIMMY: Don't say it Eman. Don't you even say it.
ME: Come on, Dad! Just so he can tell the story? He just wants to say it once! Just let him say the bad word one time!
EMAN: Just once Dad! PLEASE????
ME: Say it! Say it Eman!
EMAN: He called it a BASTARD fish!
JONIS: Ommmmmm! Dad he said it!
JIMMY: Thanks, Jen. Thanks.
ME: (cracking up) A bastard fish? That like a bass, Joni Bear?
JONIS: Yep! But big like a shark with big teeth and it'll bite you and bite your arm off!
There you have it, guys. If you're fishing and you come across the elusive Cass County Bastard fish, watch out because you might lose an entire arm taking it off of the hook...